| grounded |
[Sep. 29th, 2005|11:14 am] |
| [ | Tags | | | random | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  disappointed | ] |
*sigh* will not be updating for a while, have been grounded...XP |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 6th, 2005|01:27 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  high | ] |
oh yes and i forgoted to tell everyone-IM SINGLE!!!!!!!! HEHE yays |
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| 22 Anoying things to do on an elevator and more |
[Jun. 23rd, 2005|01:23 pm] |
| [ | Tags | | | lists | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  amused | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Boulevard of broken dreams-greenday on 104.1 | ] |
22 Annoying Things To Do On An Elevator
1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5) MEOW occasionally.
6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM" - and back away slowly
7) SAY -DING at each floor.
8) SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And push all the red buttons.
9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14) WHEN there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
16) ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17) HOLD the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18) DROP a pen and wail until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20) PRETEND you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.
21) SWAT at flies that don't exist.
22) CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it.
Redneck Mountain Technology Talk
1. LOG ON: Makin a wood stove hotter.
2. LOG OFF: Don't add no more wood.
3. MONITOR: Keepin an eye on the wood stove.
4. DOWNLOAD: Gettin the farwood off the truk.
5. MEGA HERTZ: When yer not kerful gettin the farwood.
6. FLOPPY DISC: Whatcha git from tryin to carry too much farwood.
7. RAM: That thar thing whut splits the farwood.
8. HARD DRIVE: Gettin home in the winter time.
9. PROMPT: Whut the mail ain't in the winter time.
10. WINDOWS: Whut to shut wen it's cold outside.
11. SCREEN: Whut to shut wen it's blak fly season.
12. BYTE: Whut them dang flys do.
13. CHIP: Munchies fer the TV.
14. MICRO CHIP: Whut's in the bottom of the munchie bag.
15. MODEM: Whut cha did to the hay fields.
16. DOT MATRIX: Old Dan Matrix's wife.
17. LAP TOP: Whar the kitty sleeps.
18. KEYBOARD: Whar ya hang the dang keys.
19. SOFTWARE: Them dang plastic forks and knifs.
20. MOUSE: Whut eats the grain in the barn.
21. MAINFRAME: Holds up the barn roof.
22. PORT: Fancy Flatlander wine
23. ENTER: Northerner talk fer "C'mon in y'all"
24. RANDOM ACCESS MEMORY: Wen ya cain't 'member whut ya paid fer the rifle when yore wife asks.
25. MOUSE PAD: That hippie talk fer the rat hole.
50 Fun Things to do at a Wal-Mart Store
1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.
2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.
3. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day.
4. Start playing Calvinball; see how many people you can get to join in.
5. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.
6. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.
7. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.
8. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.
9. When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially thin narrow aisles.
10. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code 3 in Housewares," and see what happens.
11. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and turn the volumes to "10".
12. Play with the automatic doors.
13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!..." etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment.
14. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, "Who BUYS this junk, anyway?"
15. Repeat Number 14 in the jewelry department.
16. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you're taking it for a "test drive."
17. Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department.
18. Play soccer with a group of friend, using the entire store as your playing field.
19. As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, "Wow. Magic!"
20. Put M&M's on layaway.
21. Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.
22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.
23. Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles.
24. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.
25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, "...I'm Batman. Come, Robin--to the Batcave!"
26. TP as much of the store as possible.
27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.
28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello" upside down.
29. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"
30. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, "Red Rover!"
31. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., "Do you have any Shnerples here?"
32. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.
33. Take bets on the battle described above.
34. Nonchalantly "test" the brushes and combs in Cosmetics.
35. Hold indoor shopping cart races.
36. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission: Impossible."
37. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.
38. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.
39. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?"
40. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.
41. Two words: "Marco Polo."
42. Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in the pet food aisle, etc.
43. "Re-alphabetize" the CD's in Electronics.
44. When someone steps away from their cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.
45. Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out.
46. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "No, no! It's those voices again!"
47. Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time.
48. Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don't get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.
49. Go to the Lego aisle, and every time someone picks up an item there yell "leave my people alone!"
50. If the greeter at the door fails to greet, go up to them and in a sad and angry voice proclaim: "WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY HI TO ME?!"
10 Ways To Make Your Neighbor Move
1. Order pizza and other food to their house and pick it up at their doorstep claiming that you don't have a phone.
2. Stand over the plants in your yard with a hose and scream, "I have your life in my hands, bow down to me!". Then point at each one and declare them good or bad plants, while watering the bad ones.
3. Bring them restraining orders on inanimate objects in their house. (i.e., chairs, books, lamps, etc.)
4. Ask them if you can put your trash in their cans, if they ask why say, "Mine are full of bodies," then stutter and say, "I uh mean other garbage," walk away laughing hysterically.
5. Patrol the perimeter of your yard while carrying a broom. If they come close state that their is a 3 foot neutral area between the two yards.
6. At night transplant the plants in their garden. In the morning say, "looks like they're on the move again."
7. When they're watching TV, pull a lawn chair behind their window. Sit down with popcorn and a drink and ask them if they could open a window so you can hear too.
8. Build snowmen with name tags of your neighbors each day hack off a different part of their body.
9. Use your TV remote to change the channels on their TV from outside. If asked why, say you protest such programs. (The more educational the program the better.)
10. Dig shallow graves at night filling your yard with brown grave patches. Make markers out of household appliances. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 18th, 2005|11:43 pm] |
| [ | Tags | | | quizzes | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  drained | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | 101.7 the Fox | ] |
MINIONS!!!!!!!!!!!! Onions?
HAHA DYLAN!!!!!!! Lecherous old man. Aimee should be the 15 year old blond w/ D cup. Describes her perfectly...except the Japanese lol. bla bla blee blee bloo!! nothing happened...so nothing to write about. XP |
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| ...booored |
[Jun. 14th, 2005|01:25 am] |
| [ | Tags | | | bored | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | bored | ] |
Alrighty...FIRST BOREDOM POST OF THE SUMMER!!!! *stupid game show music* it is....1:28 AM on Tuesday the 14th of June.....my friend has fallen asleep on my bed, leaving no room for me....I am talking to my ex-boyfriend (good Claude what HAS come over me...)..........and......yeah. |
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| Chickens!!!!!! |
[May. 14th, 2005|10:25 pm] |
| [ | Tags | | | random | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | bored | ] |
AAAA Chickens are so bizzare! They will eat anything! Rotten eggs, mice, chicks! it;s crazy! All today I dug up thisles and cleared out the chicken coop. I hate living on a ranch! NYAAAA!!!! |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 7th, 2005|06:05 pm] |
| [ | Tags | | | quizzes | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  bouncy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | the first cut is the deepest | ] |
 | You scored as Romantic Kisser. Good for you! You know how to kiss and hopefully you have a certain someone to experience a serge of happiness with. If not, it doesnt hurt to flirt kiss a little hehe. Just dont get carried away. Romantic kissing is always a plus! Kissing is an art keep it up and youll be really good! Here some tips: 1. Be ready 2. no smoking 3. start slow 4. up the intensity 5. develop rhythm 6. change it up 7. pay attention to hands 8. experiment 9. respond 10. repeat
Romantic Kisser | | 81% | Yippy Ki Yay! | | 63% | Your more of a class act than youre giving yourself credit for | | 44% | </td>
How good do you kiss?
created with QuizFarm.com |
Smoooooooooch!!!!! <3
| You scored as Antisocial Personality Disorder. Congratulations! You have ASPD! You know that blatantly disregarding social norms and the rights of others isn't just illegal; it's FUN. Jail time? Eh, look at Gary Gilmore... was he really that bad of a guy?
Unipolar Depression | | 75% | Antisocial Personality Disorder | | 75% | Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder | | 67% | Schizophrenia | | 67% | Borderline Personality Disorder | | 58% | Eating Disorders | | 50% | </td>
Which mental disorder do you have?
created with QuizFarm.com |
I'm cRaAaAaAaAzY!!!! |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 4th, 2005|09:13 pm] |
| [ | Tags | | | poems | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | psyence | ] |
A pooooooeeeem!!!!
Silver Wings
Lift me up on silver wings
Bear me away
Away from this place
I don't care where
Anywhere but here
I could live in the depths of hell
As long as you
are by my side
Fly me around the moon
above the stars
hold me in your arms
spirit me away
give my heart wings
And love me. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 4th, 2005|07:59 pm] |
| [ | Tags | | | serious/long | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | crushed | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | zoe jane-staind | ] |
If I had a dollar for every time I was called ugly or fat, I would be a fucking billionare! Excuse me while I go and cry. |
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lazy